A week quickly passed since my sister's visit. Tadayoshi was adjusting nicely to a life of domesticity. When I arrived home from work everyday, he was patiently waiting for me. The laundry was always done, our apartment basically spotless. He enjoyed cooking for me and the time we spent after dinner watching television or reading or just cuddling. And as much as I enjoyed spending time with him, I was extremely stressed out at work.
Murakami was almost constantly watching me, to the point where I was not able to focus during work. Subaru had also heard from Yoko that Tadayoshi's father had been making a fuss to the local police about searching my apartment. The most worrisome part was that for almost the entire week, there had been a car with black tinted windows parked outside of my apartment.
I wanted to tell Tadayoshi about all of it, but he seemed so happy and content with the way things were. I couldn't ruin his happiness. Especially when he deserved it so much.
He must have sensed that something was wrong though. A week after the problems at work started, we were sitting on the couch after dinner. Tadayoshi's head was resting in my lap, his legs thrown over the arm of the sofa as he read a magazine. I must have been staring off into space for quite some time when I heard Tadayoshi's voice, “Are you okay?”
I looked down to see him staring up at me. “Yeah, just tired.”
“You are always tired lately,” he muttered, setting his magazine on his chest.
The stress of work was exhausting, but still I found it hard to fall asleep at night. The reason why I pretended to fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow had less to do with actual exhaustion as it did with my lack of libido. I had heard that stress could lower one's sex drive, but this proved it. It was hard to want sex when you knew that there was some stranger outside your apartment waiting for you to make one wrong move.
“I'm sorry,” I told Tadayoshi. “It's been a really tiring week at work.”
“I can help you unwind,” he suggested, and I almost rolled my eyes. Of course, he was sixteen and always in the mood.
He must have sense that my answer would be no because he said in a small voice, “Are you tired of me already?”
The question caught me off guard and I didn't answer him for a few minutes, searching for some excuse.
He mistook my silence as a yes and he removed his head from my lap. “I'll pack my things tomorrow. I won't burden you by staying here if you don't want me.”
“Wait,” I called as he stood up from the couch, preparing to leave me alone to my thoughts. “I am not tired of you.” I patted the couch for him to come sit down next to me.
He remained where he stood, watching me cautiously. “It's okay if you don't want to be with me anymore. Just don't lie to me about it.”
I shook my head. “I'm not lying. I just have a lot on my mind right now. Work is really difficult, your dad is trying his hardest to get someone to search the apartment for you, and I still haven't come up with a conclusion for what to do when he finally gets his way.”
I watched Tadayoshi's face and saw that he was slowly accepting my excuse. I continued, “It's not that I don't want to be with you. I am just worried that the amount of time I have left with you is running out.”
He joined me again on the sofa, grabbing my hands. “I worry about that too. I love you, Shota. Even if something bad happens and we have to be separated, my feelings won't change. I'll wait for you until we can be together again. So let's make the best out of the time we have right now.”
His logic made a lot of sense to me then, and the way he was staring at me had my heart beating quickly. Tadayoshi pulled me onto his lap, wrapping his arms around me. His head came to rest on my shoulder and his hands started traveling up and down my back, making my body feel warm all over.
I sighed in contentment, realizing that a week was way too long to go without feeling Tadayoshi's touch. Even something as simple as him rubbing my back was enough to relax me.
He seemed to be enjoying the contact as much as me, I discovered, as he began nuzzling my neck. I almost complained when he lifted his head from where it had been resting, but my disappointment disappeared as he leaned in, kissing me softly.
And then I was pulling him into me as he laid me back on the couch, resting between my legs. He broke the kiss, pulling his shirt off quickly before returning his lips to mine. My tongue slid past his lips and I found myself moaning at how good his mouth tasted.
His ministrations were far too gentle for me that night and it occurred to me what a stress relieving release I had been missing out on all week.
I pushed him off of me, sitting up and pulling off my own shirt, desperate to feel his skin against mine. I crawled into his lap, grabbing his face and pushing my tongue back into his warm mouth. I felt him grow hard against my thigh as he moaned into my mouth.
Lost in the moment, I started rubbing myself against him, pleased with myself when he broke the kiss to gasp at the contact. He grabbed at my hips, raising his own under me as he tried to rub himself harder against me.
On top of him, I noticed for the first time the way his cheeks turned pink when aroused and the way his eyes completely clouded over with lust as he blinked up at me. He threw his head back, painting as I continued grinding against him.
My hands went to the front of his pants, nervously fumbling with the button and the zipper. As soon as I managed to get the zipper down, Tadayoshi was already raising his hips off the couch to help me pull his pants off.
The sight of him laying under me, his cock straining against his underwear as he looked at me hungrily, had me on fire with excitement. I reached out, rubbing my flat palm against his hardness and he hissed in pleasure at the contact. He felt so amazingly hard against my hand, I was overcome with the desire to touch him. I licked my lips, hurriedly pulling his underwear down.
Tadayoshi was panting hard, looking at me as I stared down at his hard cock. “Touch me, Shota,” he begged, raising his hips at me.
I felt myself getting harder at his request, wrapping my hand around his thick cock and imaging what it would feel like to have him inside of me, stretching me. I shuddered in pleasure at the thought, my hand squeezing Tadayoshi's length as he thrust into it.
“Ah, don't stop,” he panted as I slid my hand up his shaft.
His moans had such an effect on me, I quickly unbuttoned my own pants and pushed them down. My left hand continued sliding up and down his shaft as I grabbed my own cock. I leaned my head back as I thrust into my own hand, wondering how it would feel to be buried deep inside of Tadayoshi's warm body.
“Fuck,” I heard him say and when I opened my eyes he was staring at me, licking his own lips. “You're so hot.”
I blushed, letting go of my own dick and leaning down to kiss him. My hand suddenly felt warm and sticky. I looked down at my hand, coated in Tadayoshi's cum, “Sorry,” he breathed. “You just looked so good. I couldn't help it.”
He was still so hard in my hand as I continued pumping my fist over him. He closed his eyes again, biting his lip and thrusting into my hand.
“Mmm,” he opened his eyes, staring at me. “Shota, let me fuck you.”
His words almost made me cum, and I unconsciously spread my legs a little, wanting to feel him inside of me. I blushed at the thought, as he sat up again, pushing me back into a laying position. He grabbed my thighs, spreading my legs so he could position himself between them.
I was suddenly nervous as I realized how serious he was. He grabbed my length, pumping at it achingly slow as he began sliding his slippery cock against my ass. I shook my head as he released my manhood. The he grabbed my arms with one hand and held them above my head.
“Wait...” I said, nervous. As much as I had wanted to feel him in the most intimate way possible, I realized that I needed to keep a level head. This was the most serious turn our relationship could take and I was worried if we were both ready for it.
Tadayoshi blinked at me and with his free hand, I felt him position himself at my entrance, his slick head prodding at my most intimate place. “Shota... please,” he panted, and my vision blurred as he applied pressure, desperate to bury himself inside of me.
I shook my head again, although my legs seemed to have a mind of their own as they easily spread to give him access. I was panting now, as my body and mind seemed to be in conflict.
The doorbell rang then, and I blinked in confusion before I realized what was happening. I quickly pushed him off of me and sat up, searching for my discarded clothes.
“Ignore it,” Tadayoshi told me, clearly disappointed that we had been interrupted.
“It could be important. Go hide in the bedroom.” I tossed his clothes at him and pushed him towards the bedroom as I pulled my own pants on.
Scrambling to get my shirt on over my head, the doorbell rang again. “Coming!” I shouted, almost tripping over my briefcase as my hand closed around the door knob.
I threw the door open, surprised to see Uchi standing on the other side. “Konbanwa,” he said, smiling.
“Ah,” I bowed, confused by his appearance. “Konbanwa.”
“Can I come in?” he asked, and looked over my shoulder into my apartment.
I, too, glanced over my shoulder to make sure that Tadayoshi was nowhere in sight. I nodded my head, having no excuse to keep him from entering.
I stood back and let him enter, watching him as he removed his shoes. “Nice place,” he said, looking around.
“Thanks,” I said, wondering why he had decided to stop by.
“It must get lonely here all by yourself,” and I saw his eyes dart to the bedroom door.
I shook my head quickly. “No,” and I stepped in front of him, blocking his curious gaze. “It doesn't.”
He smiled, stepping around me and heading for the bedroom door. “Really? Aren't you going to take me on a tour of the place?”
I growled, taking note of how annoying Uchi Hiroki was. “No. Its a small place. You can see pretty much everything from here.”
He turned the knob on the door, throwing it open. “You can come out, Tadayoshi.”
It took a moment before the shock of his rudeness wore off. I rushed to the door, hoping to pull it closed before he caught a glimpse of Tadayoshi.
Uchi was fast, however, and blocked the door. Tadayoshi nervously appeared and a panic rose in me as I stared back and forth between the two brothers. No one spoke as my head began spinning. I needed to come up with an excuse as to why Tadayoshi was in my apartment.
“Hey,” Uchi smirked, seemingly amused by our dumbfounded reactions.
We stood in shock for a few moments, watching as Uchi sauntered back across the living room and made himself comfortable in one of the chairs.
“Aren't you going to offer me some tea?” he asked, staring at me.
“Oh,” I crossed the living room towards the kitchen. “Sorry.”
I was hesitant to leave Tadayoshi and Uchi alone together, so I quickly filled the kettle with water and set it on the stove. I turned, straining my ears to hear what was happening in the living room.
“So,” Uchi began a few moments later. “You ran away?”
Tadayoshi said nothing in reply, probably still shocked and confused by
Uchi's sudden appearance.
I quietly reached into the cabinet to pull out a cup, still listening to their conversation.
“You sure picked a great time to do it,” Uchi said, all sympathy leaving his voice. “Right when he as going to announce an heir.”
“It's none of your business,” Tadayoshi replied, his voice sounding small.
“I guess that's the answer to my next question then,” I heard Uchi stand up and begin pacing the room. “It was going to be you, right?”
Again, Tadayoshi said nothing in response to Uchi's question.
“So you just run away?” he asked, and I could hear his voice begin to raise.
“You wanted it, didn't you? I don't want to run his stupid company. And even if I did, you deserve it more than me.”
“I don't want your pity!” He spat out, disgust in his voice.
I quickly finished making his tea and rushed back into the living room, handing Uchi the cup of tea. He set it down on the table and reseated himself. My interference seemed to have calmed the atmosphere slightly.
“I don't pity you,” Tadayoshi said quietly. I sat down next to him. “You're my brother. If you want this that much, then I want you to have it.”
Uchi stared at Tadayoshi, his face softening somewhat. “I didn't ask you to do that. I want to do this on my own.”
A silence filled the room and we all shifted in our spots, not sure what to say. I wanted to reach over and grab Tadayoshi's hand, but with Uchi there, it was far too risky.
“Well,” Uchi finally spoke, turning towards me. “I didn't come to talk to you about that. I wanted to talk to Yasuda.”
“Me?” I asked, surprised
Uchi nodded his head and leaned towards me. “It's about Tadayoshi too. The old man knows he's here.”
Tadayoshi and I shared a panicked look before refocusing our attention on Uchi. “He does?”
“Yep, and he finally talked one of his buddies on the police force into coming here to search for Tadayoshi. Tomorrow.”
My heart was beating hard enough that I thought it would fly right out of my chest. I reached for Tadayoshi's hand then, no longer caring who was in the room. My worst fears were coming true.
“Why are you telling us this?” Tadayoshi asked, skeptically, slipping his hand out of my grasp. I blinked in confusion.
“So that you can find time to go somewhere else...” Uchi said, as though it was obvious.
Tadayoshi still seemed skeptical, and I was too busy wondering why he had shied away from my contact. “I thought you hated me. Why would you help?”
“I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing it for Yasuda. He's helping me out, so the least I can do is help him out. You're important to him, right?”
Tadayoshi didn't say anything, but I caught him looking at me from the corner of his eye.
“I don't care what you are to each other, though I could probably guess based on your messy hair,” Uchi pointed to Tadayoshi, then to me, “And the fact that you're wearing your shirt inside out.”
I blushed, and Tadayoshi still had no reaction.
“That's really all I came to say,” Uchi stood.
I stood up too, “Thank you for stopping by.”
Uchi nodded, “Thanks for the tea.” He turned to Tadayoshi, “You could thank me, too, you know.”
Tadayoshi stood up and mumbled a thanks.
“You don't think you can trust me?” Uchi asked.
Tadayoshi shook his head.
“Didn't you say that we are brothers?” Uchi questioned, smirking a bit.
“Didn't you say that you hated me?” Tadayoshi asked in response.
“Since my mom died, my life has been shit. When she died, there was no one to take care of me. And then I found out that Ohkura was my dad. I thought, maybe, just maybe, I would be able to pull everything in my life back together again. I thought that maybe it wouldn't be so bad if Tadayoshi was my older brother. But he refused to acknowledge me. I had to take him to court to prove it and even then he only let me live with you guys because the judge made him.
“He didn't want me in that house, and didn't want to waste any of his precious time with me. All of the staff would whisper about how I was the bastard child, how they couldn't believe that Ohkura Hideo would sleep with a maid, that I had somehow tricked everyone into believing that I was really an Ohkura.
“But everyone loved little Tadayoshi. They were always doting on you, and our father only loved you. Everyone talked about how great and wonderful and kind your mother had been and what a tragedy it had been that she died so young. But my mother? She was dirty and conniving. They said that she deserved to die...” Uchi trailed off, the bitterness that had entered his voice dissolving into tears.
“I couldn't understand it,” he started again. “I couldn't understand why you were so much better than me. I was furious that you had everything just because you were born and that my mother had worked hard every day in her life and this is how it ended for her. I hated you. I really really hated you.
“Then good ol' dad told me that I had a chance to be the heir, to beat you. I just had to promise to leave Osaka until I was done with high school. And he arranged it with the courts that I would live in Tokyo while studying.
“And everyday the hate I had grew more and more. Not just the hate for you, but hate for everything. I I started hanging out with bad people, started doing bad things and I ruined someone's life. My best friend's life...” he trailed off and I knew he was talking about Ryo. “And now it seems that I've lost him forever.”
Uchi sighed, “I don't want to lose him, and if I have to fight for him, I need to change. I have to let go of the anger I have for you. It's not your fault that you were born, or that my mother died, or any of the other millions of things I have been blaming you for. I'm sorry, Tadayoshi.”
I could tell that Tadayoshi was having trouble keeping the smile from spreading across his face. “So does that mean we can be friends again?”
A look of horror crossed Uchi's face as Tadayoshi tried to hug him, “Hey, hey, don't get ahead of yourself now!”
Tadayoshi dropped his arms, his trademark pouty look crossing his charming features.
“We still have this matter of who is the rightful heir to settle...”
“I already told you that I don't want it. You can have it,” Tadayoshi's pouting continued.
“I don't want to have it handed to me. I want to earn it.”
“Well, I don't have any intention of going back to his house. This is my home, and Shota is my new life. So, I am telling you that its all yours.”
“You can't run away forever,” Uchi shot back.
Tadayoshi looked away, a pensive expression on his face. This may have been the first time such thoughts had crossed his mind, but for me, it was something I was constantly thinking about.
It would be childish to think that Tadayoshi could just run away from everything in his life and be with me, happily ever after. He was not ready to face his father and his responsibilities now, but if we had any chance at a future, he would have to deal with it.
Uchi noted Tadayoshi's thoughtful expression and continued, “When you do face it, I want a fair fight.”
I watched Tadayoshi's face, wondering what he was thinking. Two weeks ago, Tadayoshi had come to terms with the fact that he would eventually have to return home and face his responsibilities of becoming heir to the Ohkura fortune. Now, however, he was fighting desperately to stay with me.
I changed him, though, and I was happy that it was my influence that had convinced him he could do whatever he wanted with his life. What worried me, however, was that he had developed the same dependency I had. He couldn't live without me anymore than I could without him.
Tadayoshi had already promised me that day that he would wait for me if we were separated. Always on my mind was the thought of how easily I could lose him. I knew that,eventually, he would have to stand up to his father. If we wanted to be together forever, he would have to properly break away from that part of his life.
Perhaps he ran away because he was afraid of his father hating him, or maybe because of his brother, or maybe just because he was miserable. Maybe for all of those reasons. And while I knew that his life had not been happy, I also knew that it was hard to run away from anything. Working with recovering addicts, domestically abused people, and those who have been desperate enough to attempt suicide made me realize exactly how hard it was to give something or someone up.
I also knew that it did not solve any problems. Like drugs, or abuse, or anything else, running away did nothing but fill a person with a sense of emptiness. I could only fill the emptiness in Tadayoshi for so long. If we ever wanted to be happy together, it could only come down to him making amends with everything from his life before we met.
I wondered how Tadayoshi's father would take it. He seemed to be under the impression that his father would not take no for an answer. But perhaps he would be able to accept his son's own desires. The man could not be completely unfeeling, for he had loved Tadayoshi's mother once.
And if he could accept that Tadayoshi wanted something different from his life, would he be able to accept us? Producing an heir seemed to be important to him, and that was something that Tadayoshi and I would never be able to physically do. And although the thought of raising a child with Tadayoshi filled me with an unexplainable and confusing warmth, that child might never have the same blood in his veins as Tadayoshi.
I had been so worried about Tadayoshi meeting my own parents that I was now faced with the fear of meeting his father too. I shook the though from my head, knowing that there was no point in fretting over something that might never happen.
Lost in my thoughts, I barely noticed that Uchi was leaving until the door was closing behind him. Immediately, I turned to Tadayoshi.
“I guess he's right,” Tadayoshi sighed. “Its time for me to stop running.”
I shook my head. Selfishly, I was not ready for Tadayoshi to confront his problems yet. I wanted him to stay by my side. “You don't have to go back now. Wait until things cool off a little.”
Tadayoshi stared at me, “He's coming tomorrow. We don't have time to let things cool off.”
I ignored him, already holding my phone to my ear. “Hello? Sis?”
“Yeah. What's up?”
I looked over and Tadayoshi was watching me curiously. “I need a favor.”
“What is it?” She asked, sensing the worry in my voice.
“Tadayoshi needs somewhere to stay...” I trailed off.
“Why? What's going on?”
“I can't tell you right now, but can you do this for me?” There was no way I could tell my sister the whole sordid story. She accepted me and Tadayoshi, but I didn't know if she was ready to accept the rest of our relationship. At this point, the less she knew, the better.
“Is he in trouble?” She asked.
“Kind of,” I nodded, though she couldn't see me.
“Shota, what have you got yourself into? Are you in trouble? What is going on?” She asked, her voice becoming worried.
“No, I'm fine. Its just that Tadayoshi can't stay here right now,” I said cryptically.
She must have sensed that something was wrong, but that I would give her no information right now. She sighed, “Fine. He can stay here, but I want to know what's going on...”
“I will come home this weekend and explain everything then,” I promised, hoping that gave me enough time to figure out a way to make the situation sound better than it was.
“When is Tadayoshi coming?”
“Tonight. Can you meet him at the train station in a few hours?”
She sighed in annoyance. “That's fine.”
“Shota, are you sure everything is fine?”
“Yeah. Don't worry about me.”
“Okay,” she said and I wasn't sure if she believed me. “I'll meet Tadayoshi there in a couple of hours.”
“Okay. Bye-bye.” I hung up the phone and turned to Tadayoshi.
He was hanging his head, “I'm sorry for always troubling you...”
I shook my head wrapping my arms around him. “You're not troubling me.”
He wrapped his arms around me too, and hugged me tight. “Thank you, Shota.”
“No problem,” I smiled, though the air felt heavy. “You should pack.”
He nodded, pulling away from me and we both felt the thick tension in the air. A painful good-bye was hanging above our heads. The past week had been so amazing, neither of us wanted it to end.
Sneaking him to the train station proved to be difficult with the car parked outside of my apartment, but we managed it successfully.
We didn't speak the entire way to the train station. Once there, I wanted to hug him, but the public location seemed to forbid such a display. Instead, we stood awkwardly at the ticket machines, silence enveloping us.
He paused near the turn-styles, and I handed him a wad of money. “I'll see you this weekend,” I told him and he was gone.
I hoped that he would make it safely and that we would get to see each other again. I knew how easy it would be for his father to find him when he was alone and vulnerable in a part of town he did not know.
I was filled with uneasiness as I walked back home. In my apartment, I waited and waited for a call from Tadayoshi or my sister, some sign that they were safe and okay. I carried the phone to my bedroom and laid down, hugging a pillow to my chest.
After what felt like an eternity of waiting, the phone finally rang and I hurriedly answered it.
“No,” my sister's voice came through.
She laughed, sensing my disappointment. “Hold on.”
I heard some shuffling in the background before Tadayoshi's voice came over the line, “Hello?”
“Ah, you're okay,” I sighed in relief.
“Uh-huh,” Tadayoshi answered, though his voice sounded heavy.
I didn't know what to say to him. “I miss you,” I blurted out, immediately realizing how stupid it sounded when we'd only been apart a short amount of time.
“Me too,” he said, and some of the tension left his voice. “I love you.”
I blushed, knowing that my sister was listening in, “I love you too.”
“Sister wants to talk to you again,” and I could hear him passing the phone back.
“You guys are too cute!” She squealed, and I had to pull the phone away from my ear to keep my eardrum from bursting. “But, this weekend I want explanations.”
“Okay,” I said, already dreading it. “Sis, don't tell mom and dad he's there. I will introduce them this weekend.”
“Okay. Get some sleep. You sound tired.”
“Goodnight,” I said loud enough, hoping that Tadayoshi would here.
“Night,” she said before hanging up the phone.
I sighed and buried my face in a pillow. I felt tears spring to my eyes. It still smelled like Tadayoshi. And I realized that I felt lonelier than I ever had before. Though he had only been gone for a few hours, I already missed him.
A/N: Sorry about the long wait between chapters but now that I am done with midterms, I plan to update 2x a week. I hope to finish the story before finals (in 5 weeks). Hope you enjoyed a chapter. I'll post the next one sometime this weekend :)